October 23, 2009

local | commercials

I’m pretty sure I want a mobile home now.

via

October 19, 2009

i love | to travel!

chickenporch

I hate people who say things like “I love to travel.” It’s like saying “I love bread.” Of course you love bread. It’s delicious. And traveling is fun. You get to leave your regular life and go hang out somewhere else. What is not lovable about this? Nothing. Exactly. So next time someone asks you what you enjoy to do, please refrain from saying traveling. Instead say you enjoy breathing. “I enjoy breathing. But only once in a while if the funds permit.”

October 19, 2009

naked | marge

marge

Marge Simpson is the original hot chick with a douche bag.

See her Playboy issue here here.

October 16, 2009

falcon | and the balloon

This is what dumb looks like.

October 16, 2009

beyonce: black | white?

October 15, 2009

grammar | nazi

grammar nazi

I used to be one of those people. You know, the grammar nazi who would correct you if you dared use the wrong there/their/they’re. This was ironic since I was the one that required a cheat sheet when working with Naomi at Clubplanet. She wrote the above down on a Post-It and I referred to it when writing articles. I loved it and used it daily when one day, I spilled my coffee on it. It’s a sad thing to lose your coffee and your grammar education in the same day. I have never fully recovered, which you would know if you read any of this shit. I’m excited for this new post-it. Whoray for good grammar!

Want your own? Hear you go.

;)

October 14, 2009

nyc advertising | takeover

I loathe the advertising industry. I heart this video.

October 14, 2009

flash | back

pogs

Pogs!

Yeah, I used to play with them. I don’t remember what exactly that entailed but I guess it was fun enough to spend my allowance on. Memories….

October 13, 2009

midgets!

It’s been a while since we’ve seen any of Zohra’s people. No, I don’t mean midgets, I mean Punjabi people.

From here.

October 13, 2009

this is | fucking insane

transexual couple

“After twenty years of sex-free marriage, a frigid woman has discovered that her asexual husband is really a woman, and she finally admitted that she is really a man.”

What’s up with people getting married without having sex first? That’s just wrong.

More…

“Marco and Kalala Tergensonen, of Kuopio, Finland, had both been dressing as the opposite sex since their teenage years.

Marco, originally Marcia, 38, had always enjoyed dressing, talking, and acting like a woman.

And Kalala, originally Katu, had always enjoyed cutting his hair and dressing to look like a man.

When the couple fell in love and got married, it just made each of their little games that much more believable.

And, in twenty years, they just never got around to having sex. The subject simply never came up, since neither of them wanted to face the issue.”

Source

October 13, 2009

gamers | love

gamer_mentality

October 13, 2009

my dream | computer

imac

From here.

October 12, 2009

i want | this

I spent my childhood watcing my mom play Super Mario Brothers and Zelda on Nintendo. The game console was in my room and when I’d come home from school, I would have to ask her if it was okay to shut off the game she had paused. It usually wasn’t okay. Mom has since upgraded to better systems but I sure would love to get her the old-school Nintendo. And by that I mean I would love it if someone took on that mini research project for me and just let me know where I could buy it.

October 12, 2009

scary | stuff

family

It took me a while to see it…

From Awkwardfamilyphotos.com

October 12, 2009

<3 | sarah silverman

October 12, 2009

goodbye | friend :(

dogs

Via

October 12, 2009

me | my hair | and my mom

meandvin

^me, my hair and Vinny.

Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time on my hair. My goal is to achieve the wavy look that is all the rage nowadays. Unfortunately I’m a retard and things take me twice as long to achieve. However, I don’t let my disability stand in the way of my effort and so I have been trying. This past week I succeeded in almost getting it to look the way I want. It took two hours of straightening my curly hair to then curl it with the result being only a slight wave that was almost nothing like the way I wanted it to look. Success.

So then I go to my mom’s house. I am in a good mood. I think she senses it because there is no other reason she would say what she said next.

Mom: What’s wrong with your hair?

I stare at her. She stares at my hair. I’m not sure what she means. I thought it looked good.

Mom: I just don’t get it. Is it curly? Is it straight? What have you done here?

I look at her and decide to let it go. It is Saturday. I’ve had a busy week not doing anything. I don’t need the negativity. I think she senses this because there is no other explanation as to why she would say what she said just one hour later.

Mom: But really, what’s wrong with your hair?
Me: Why are you such a hater?
Mom: No I’m not.
Me: You are. You don’t like anything.
Mom: I do. I like it curled but your hair is confused.
Me: Okay. I see its time for me to leave. Good bye dad. Good bye hater. Always a pleasure!

I left shortly after. As I was making my way down the stairs, the Palmolive dish soap my mom had given me opened. I was holding it between my armpit because I didn’t have enough hands and sure enough to got all over my bag, clothes and hair. It smelled nice so I considered it a leave-in Shampoo.

She won again.

October 12, 2009

i was being | sarcastic

sarcastic1

I hate when people make a sarcastic comment and then follow up with “I was being sarcastic for you people that didn’t get it.” Really? Because I thought you were just being a loser. On that note, if any of you ever say this to me, please consider yourself on my “I wish your mom had an abortion” list. I am not being sarcastic for those of you who didn’t get it.

October 12, 2009

picture of | the day

hughjackman

Hugh Jackman turning into Wolverine OR…. not.

Via

October 9, 2009

i | coke

icoke

It is only natural that the iPhone would be used as drug paraphernalia since it doesn’t actually work as a phone.

Source