urinals

France.

via.

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madonna makes friends with photoshop

Like most people, I derive joy from other people’s misery. And so what? Is it really so wrong to build my self esteem on the backs of before pictures? It’s better than talking shit about people, eh?

source

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fancy stop motion

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ipad humor

from here

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flaws and all

Val sent this to me and now I’m obsessed. I think it’s a beautiful song and quite accurate. And then Vinny sent me an article about Jay-Z and this is what he said…

“I don’t think there is such thing as a perfect relationship. It is unrealistic and hoping for too much. I don’t think it is worth all that pressure. We also have our struggles and problems.” via.

I really wonder what they could possibly argue about?

Beyonce: Hey jerk! You moved my Grammy to make room for your AMA? How rude?!
Jay-Z: Well stop putting your Grammy everywhere. Just because you have more than any other female doesn’t mean you have to put them everywhere!
Beyonce:It matches the couch in this room and I WANT IT HERE.

Jay’s phone rings.

Beyonce: Who is that? Rihanna again?
Jay-Z: It’s Kanye.
Beyonce: Uh-huh. How convenient for you. I’ll fucking kill you motherfucker.
Jay-Z:Ohhhh. I’m soooo scared.

Beyonce lunges at Jay-Z with her Grammy.

Fade to Black

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planning a girls night out

^This pic took an hour to plan

Vinny called me yesterday and asked if him and I had plans. I said no. He said he was going to hang out with his friend. I said ok. He went to hang out with his friend. It was simple. It’s not so simple when I hang out with my friends. And now there is a study to prove it!

The new study, conducted by whothefuckknows, suggests that it takes girls an average of three days, five hours and 22 minutes to organize a girls night out. I’m not surprised.

When my girl friends plan a night out, they enjoy giving a brief updated bio of their life before getting to the hanging out part. It is usually 300+ characters and often forgets to mention the date and time of hang out.

Ex:

Hey girls! It’s been a long time. So I’m going to be free on ____ and ____ but only if ______ doesn’t decide to _______ , which we all know might happen. He he ha ha. Anyway, I was thinking we could ____________ on ________________, weather permitting, and then……….

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the ipad is great

Steve Jobs has taken to speaking like Katie Holmes, using simple adjectives to describe the iPad.

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